Judy Ruggiero: Keeping the Past Alive Through Work on Old Cemetery Board
While Judy Ruggiero grew up in West Virginia, East Haven has been her home for many years. While working in Washington, D.C., she met her husband Carl, who was stationed in Quantico, Virginia. When his father died unexpectedly, the couple moved to Connecticut to help his mother run the family business.
Soon after moving to East Haven, Judy and Carl were married and they raised their son and daughter in town. Carl was involved in a variety of organizations in town, including the East Haven Rotary and the Republican Town Committee. Judy also got involved, serving on the RTC for 14 years. Eventually she was appointed to the Old Cemetery Board.
“I didn’t have a clue what this board was all about, but what tales the older people could tell—it was just amazing to me,” says Judy. “I grew up in a little one-horse town and we lived on a farm and only went to town when we needed groceries. If that town had this kind of history, I didn’t know it.”
After joining the board, Judy began to learn more about East Haven’s history from the other members, including Cathy Watts and Jack Brereton, who have both since passed away; Peggy Thomas; and Bill Jackson, who is the chairman and town historian. Judy began to recognize the names on many of East Haven’s street signs as historical figures who are buried in Old Cemetery.
“Thomas Morris was a shipbuilder; John Thompson was a farmer; Ralph Russell was an iron worker; John Chidsey was a deacon, a tanner, and a shoemakers; Street Chidsey was the master builder of the town—these are jobs people don’t have anymore,” says Judy. “As board members, we’re the watchdogs for the founding fathers of East Haven who buried in the cemetery. When you walk through the gates, you step into a story of lives that once were.”
As she explored the cemetery, Judy noticed many symbols carved into the stone grave markers and she soon realized each symbol had a meaning. Judy noted several meanings: the anvil for martyrdom, angel’s head for a soul’s flight to heaven, a severed branch for mortality, tree trunks for premature death, handshakes for farewell to earthly existence, ships for church, and more.
“When you see these symbols on the graves, you realize these people died in faith and it really speaks to your soul,” says Judy, who attends Branford Evangelical Church. “It is sad to see that there are so many babies and small children. People today don’t realize how lucky we are that we have these inoculations and vaccines for diseases.”
Years ago, the board placed a box of flyers with the meanings of the symbols so visitors can understand the markings on the gravestones. Unfortunately many of the papers ended up scattered and torn throughout the grounds and the board had to remove the box.
From 2002 to 2014, there was a big push to restore many of the gravestones. There were several fundraisers, including a Chili’s night and a cookbook sale, as well as many private donations. The Old Cemetery Board was able to restore 129 gravestones as a result.
“Some of the stones had fallen and were broken and we found a mason—Benny’s Masonry in Middlefield—who has done superb work for us,” says Judy. “He’s from the old country and any time you can get something done with someone from the old country, you want to take them over anyone else.”
The board also hosted a Sympathy Tea and board members dressed up as historical figures. There was a storyteller who shared tales of the past and “everyone loved it,” according to Judy.
Sometimes people reach out to the board with questions about those buried in the cemetery. Judy recalls receiving a donation and a letter from a woman in Ohio who was trying to find out if a relative was buried in the cemetery. The board checked, but some of the stones were unreadable so they could not say for sure. Soon after receiving that letter, a member of the Townsend family asked Judy if she was interested in historical paperwork she had found.
“She had a list of the names and dates of all buried in Old Cemetery,” says Judy, who had four grandchildren and four great-grandchildren. “I began to just look through it and there was the names of these people we’d be looking for. I wrote to the woman in Ohio and said, ‘While the stone might be unreadable, at least you know they’re there.’ That was pretty special.”
In addition to raising funds to restore old gravestones, the board also works on upkeep of the cemetery. They have planted daffodils along the fence line and hired a landscaping company to keep up the grounds.
At 76 years old, Judy is currently the youngest member of the Old Cemetery Board. She noted that the board would like to add new members to help with fundraising and upkeep.
“We’re all too old to do fundraisers—they take too much time and too much energy,” says Judy. “I’m thankful to be 76 as my own mother died young, but none of us really have the stamina to get out and do what we did before: walk around and know what stones are down. If somebody doesn’t take the initiative, it’ll be overgrown in no time.”
To donate, send your name, address, and donation to: Old Cemetery Board, c/o Judy Ruggiero, Treasurer, 12 Oak Hill Dr., East Haven, CT 06513. For more information, call Marcia at 203-469-2243 or Judy at 203-469-5545.