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10/17/2024 12:45 PM

Edgar Bullard II


Edgar Fitch Bullard II, our gentle, funny, and kind son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, and friend, died at home on Sept. 3, 2024, at the age of 64. The exact cause of his death is unknown to us and has become part of the mystery of life. We deeply mourn his loss to the world and to each of us.

Fitch, the youngest of four children, was welcomed joyfully into the family on March 15, 1960, in Greenwich. When he was three months old, the family moved to Beaconsfield in England for seven years. This cross-cultural experience influenced Fitch’s life in many ways. British humor, sweets, Twiglets, and a dear childhood friend brought joy throughout his life. Fitch developed a keen sense of humor from an early age. His precocious dry wit was legendary; as a child, he often caught adults unawares with his sharp, hilarious comments, an early manifestation of British eccentricity that continued into adulthood.

Fitch had a lifelong love of cars. As a very young child, he could accurately point out the make, model, and year of every car he saw. He left behind a red 1981 Lincoln Town Car in his garage, an impressive set of matchbox cars he collected during childhood, and both completed and uncompleted model car kits of cars he had owned and loved.

Fitch attended Northfield Mount Hermon School, graduating in 1978. He loved living with a family in Germany as part of a term abroad program. In 1982, he graduated from Northwestern University with a B.S. in human development and social policy. In addition to his major studies, he continued to study German for four years and took two years of Chinese. He spent the summer of 1981 interning with the NYC Bureau of Child Welfare as a caseworker.

The qualities of caring and service defined Fitch throughout his life and work. While a college student, Fitch worked as a personal aide to a lawyer with quadriplegia, getting him up and ready for work in the morning. Later, he did the same for a friend from church with severe rheumatoid arthritis and cared for his own parents while his mother underwent treatment for breast cancer. His sister-in-law Betty sees him as her rock during her illnesses.

Among his many varied careers, Fitch was manager of Convito, a high-end restaurant in Winnetka, Illinois; co-owned Century Mall Travel, which he and his friend Lauri bought after working there together; worked at Paterno Wines in Lake Bluff, Illinois; and finally entered the insurance business with the Knights of Columbus and State Farm.

In 1985, Fitch met Timothy Thompson, the love of his life. Tim said Fitch was the kindest person he had ever known, and they cherished each other. Their friendship allowed Fitch’s love of life to flourish. They lived in Chicago for many years, eventually moving to Wonder Lake, Illinois, where they enjoyed living by the lake, cruising on their pontoon boat, and socializing with their wide circle of friends and family in the area. They were stylish dressers, meticulous homemakers, and extraordinary hosts. Both were excellent cooks and voracious readers, leaving behind an impressive collection of gay and straight literature. They were excellent conversationalists, sharing their opinions and analysis of key current events and interests. They enjoyed traveling together and going out to eat. Every year, they spent a week reading, relaxing, and hosting friends at Fitch’s family’s cabin in the Adirondacks. They brought a wonderful, loving energy and great food to family gatherings. Fitch and Tim were adored by their nieces, nephews, and the children of their friends, all of whom had unencumbered relationships with these non-parental adults who lived such a fun and elegant life so different from their own. Fitch and Tim, in turn, took great delight and stayed engaged in the lives of these young people. Their years at Wonder Lake were happy, healing ones after the shared trauma of surviving the AIDS crisis and losing so many friends during that time. Fitch and Tim kept this sorrow deep and only shared it with their families in the recent past. They were part of the transition generation in the gay community, suffering prejudice and fear as gay men and unable to express their love in public. Thankfully, they were accepted and loved by their families for whom they were in all dimensions of their lives. Most importantly, they accepted themselves and each other. In 2010, Fitch and Tim moved into their cozy home in Guilford, where they lived the rest of their lives with several beloved dogs and cats. Jax, the corgi, and Max, the tiger cat, were especially close companions to Fitch after Tim died and were with Fitch when he died.

After a long hiatus from work, while caring for Tim at home until Tim’s death in 2022, Fitch became licensed as an insurance agent in Connecticut. He loved working at the small State Farm office in Branford with the owner, Michael, and their colleague, Roberta, both of whom supported him professionally and personally in his new career. Up until the day he died, Fitch was his siblings’ local support for our father and his live-in caregiver, always willing to attend doctors’ appointments, shop, or meet an ambulance at the Emergency Department. Every Sunday, Fitch took our father to church and out to lunch, a precious experience for them both. Fitch spoke of feeling a renewed sense of community and spiritual connection from both the church members and the pastor of the North Guilford Congregational Church, the church he had attended as a child. Fitch’s love of life and living gives us joy in the midst of our sorrow at losing him.

Fitch leaves behind his father, Howard Benjamin Bullard III of Guilford; his siblings and their spouses, Patricia Carol Bullard-Bates and Kent Robert Beduhn of Silver Spring, Maryland; Howard Benjamin Bullard IV and Betty Voorhees Webster of North Sandwich, New Hampshire; and Elizabeth Bullard Morse and Richard Pettit Morse of Plainfield, New Hampshire; his childhood nanny and friend, Janet Elinor Fry of Port Washington, New York; Tim’s sister and brother-in-law, Lori Glidewell Knowlton and Kevin Dean Knowlton of Mendota, Illinois; his aunt, Martha Gilpin Hinshelwood of Keshena, Wisconsin, and uncle, Samuel Arthur Gilpin Jr., of Jacksonville, Florida; his beloved nieces and nephews and their spouses and their children; and many dear cousins and friends. He was predeceased by his mother, Patricia Gilpin Bullard; his aunt, Frances Gilpin Gumpper; his lifetime partner, Timothy Scott Thompson; and Tim’s brothers, Gary, Dennis, and Jan Thompson.

A memorial service to celebrate Fitch’s life will be held at 10:30 a.m. on Friday, Nov. 1, at the North Guilford Congregational Church, 159 Ledge Hill Road, Guilford. In lieu of flowers, donations can be sent in Fitch’s memory to the North Guilford Congregational Church’s Legacy Fund, or to the LGBTQ+, animal rescue, or refugee relief charity of your choice. Arrangements in care of the Guilford Funeral Home, 115 Church Street, Guilford. To share a memory or leave condolences, visit www.guilfordfuneralhome.com.