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01/26/2023 12:07 PM

Ruth Jacobson Ottenheimer


Ruth Jacobson Ottenheimer was a remarkable woman: a devoted mother, wife, friend, and community volunteer. Born in Bunzlau, Germany, on Oct. 22, 1930, the daughter of Walter and Ella Jacobson, both of whom perished in the Holocaust. She traveled to England in 1939, at the age of eight, with her brother Kenneth, age six, on the Kinder Transport, believing they were going on holiday with their parents, whom they never saw again.

When Ruth was 16 and her brother Ken was 14, she was invited to move to Ohio to live with their aunt and uncle. Ruth, as a female, was told she could not make decisions for herself until she was 21, so they were separated, which was devastating, given the earlier loss of their parents. Ruth vowed she would visit him as soon as she was 21. She saved her money and bought a ticket for the Queen Mary to visit her brother, who was in college at the University of Ohio. Upon arrival in the New York harbor (June 1952), she saw her brother from the ship’s deck and stated in a letter to friends, “If I was a bird who could fly, I’d fly into his arms.” They stayed in New York for a few days, which she described as “a dream come true—everything was different, food everywhere.” She met her future husband, Richard, her brother’s tennis partner, in Zanesville, Ohio; they became engaged in July and married in August 1952. Ruth gave birth to two children, Susan and Robert. The family moved to Visalia, California. In 1969, Richard was promoted to Director of Engineering for the Armstrong Rubber Company, headquartered in New Haven, which brought them to Madison, where they lived until 1995, and then retired in Jupiter, Florida. Following Richard’s death, Ruth moved to Palm Beach Gardens.

Ruth was a stay-at-home mom until 1973. She was actively involved in civic and volunteer activities, including leading the Jr. Red Cross, AFS, and developing a volunteer program at Daniel Hand High School. She was a founding member of Temple Beth Tikvah in Madison and was actively involved in Hadassah. Once her children were out of the home, she embarked on a paid career including managing Bullard’s Furniture and later, the Director of Public Relations for the Brian Alden Company, where she organized and promoted jazz concerts on the New Haven Greene for the public. Upon retirement in Jupiter, she was an active member of Temple Beth Am and the PBG Chapter of Brandeis.

As a Holocaust survivor, Ruth generously and bravely shared the trauma she endured at an early age and her message of hope that the spirit can not only survive but thrive in talks she gave to children from underserved communities who faced their own adversity.

Ruth had a zest for life. She loved the beach, watching turtles hatch at the crack of dawn, bike rides along Madison’s shore, parades, outdoor antique shows, trips to New York, pounding the pavement for 60 blocks or more visiting museums, seeing shows and people watching; and she was a gourmet cook. Ruth was charming, sophisticated, glamorous, charismatic, had a quick wit, and at times, a biting tongue.

Ruth died peacefully in her sleep on Jan. 9, 2023, in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, at the age of 92, after a long battle with Alzheimer’s. She was predeceased by her husband, Richard J. Ottenheimer (2004); and her brother Kenneth Jacobson (2005). She is survived by her adult children, Susan Ottenheimer of Guilford and Robert W. Ottenheimer (Pam) of Newtown, Pennsylvania.

A celebration of Ruth’s life will be planned for a later date. If you would like to honor Ruth, you may donate to the building fund, Temple Beth Tikvah, 196 Durham Road, Madison, CT 06443 or Trustbridge, Hospice 5300 East Avenue, West Palm Beach, Florida 33407.